Home guidelines from Hollywood

By Joanne Loos Posted in: ImproveThe Fix is In

Tonight, the Academy Awards ceremony will commence for the 90th time. These awards, also known as the Oscars, recognize excellence in the American film industry, with awards for everything from sound to costume design to best overall film. It has become a measuring stick for success in Hollywood, with those who have earned the award carrying the distinction as a prefix to their names.

While I have not seen all of the films up for the awards this year, I still consider myself a fan of film. I look to the entertainment industry for more than just pure entertainment. I have found that, often, movies and TV shows will offer opportunities to learn. More often than not, the industry will dramatize events, weaving in romantic storylines with historical representations. Think of Best Picture Academy Award winning film, Titanic. But that’s what makes learning about these events so easy.

In fact, the entertainment industry can teach us about many things in life, aside from history. Movies and TV shows have been offering us nuggets of advice for everything from romantic life to work motivation to home living, for decades. In honor of the 90th Oscars, here are some of my favorite home guidelines from Hollywood:

“Keep your shower curtains straight to avoid mildew growth,” Monica Gellar, Friends.

“Toilet paper rolls should hang in the ‘over’ position,” Carol Foster, Step by Step.

“No wire hangers!” Joan Crawford, Mommy Dearest.

“For every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun and … snap! The job’s a game,” Mary Poppins, Mary Poppins

“When choosing your spot on the couch, keep in mind warmth, cross breezes and the angle to the television — too direct would discourage conversation and too wide can create ‘parallax distortion,'” Sheldon Cooper, The Big Bang Theory.

“You can’t over-dry your laundry, for the same reason you can’t over-wet it,” Jerry Seinfeld, Seinfeld.

“You can use a tennis racket as a bubble bath frother,” Manny Delgado, Modern Family.

“When you have company coming over, you should always have something baking,” Cher Horowitz, Clueless.

“Enlightened men help with the housework,” Tim Allen, Home Improvement.

Have a comment or question for Joanne? Email thefixisin@ gmail.com.